Get Your Body Back Foolishness: the story of a thick girl

 

​I remember struggling with my weight when I was in high school; that was over 10 years ago, and I am still struggling.

After I gave birth to my daughter, that struggle did not get any easier. I was breastfeeding and did not want more children anytime soon, so to avoid lowering my milk production, I was prescribed the mini-pill as the only form of birth control that I could take.

I gained 50 lbs. in 2 months

 so of course I stopped taking the pill. Now, I am the biggest I have ever been…

Don’t say “get your body back” 

After gaining so much weight, I became depressed; everyone kept telling me that I needed to get my body back… this only made me feel worse. I started comfort eating and gave up on my physical appearance. I disliked everything about my body… I would look in the mirror and feel disgusted. I had no motivation to work out and I had no intention of changing the negative body image I had.

I was body-shaming myself.

While browsing Facebook, I read this post, “…we often take for granted the ultimate sacrifice women have to make during the 9 month pregnancy process. Her body will go through unbelievable changes…Her self-esteem will take a hit. And most importantly her life will be at risk. But we unfairly expect her body to snap back in place…as if she was the mother on [The] Incredible’s. She will be left with battle marks and scars. She will try and hide them. She will struggle everyday with the feeling of if she is attractive enough…cherish her, compliment her daily and let her know that she is even more beautiful now than before.” – Shawn L. Minter

I cried immediately. I saw myself in these words and I knew then, that by focussing on getting my body back, I was body-shaming myself.

I learned that I needed to change the way I saw my new body; my Foopah, Stretch Marks and my Boobs (after breastfeeding). I needed to love myself as I am, now. My mind needed to be healthy before I could have a healthy journey of eating right and working out.


In an article I wrote, 3 Big and Timely Lesson that Being Insecure Taught Mewhat was published by Precious on her site Rock Your Reality (to be inspired, check out her site), I disclosed that “Instead of trying to get my body back and body shaming myself, I learned to” do the following:

  • Not to wear makeup daily, so that I can love my natural face (see my post #NoMakeupMondays 
  • Focus on being healthy instead of fit
  • Say five things I love about myself everyday
  • Look in the mirror and focus on the things I love about my body

Don’t Hate Your Body

It took some time, but I am now in the place where my thoughts about myself and my body are becoming more positive. I made a promise to myself that I would focus on my health and not on losing weight, by doing the following: 

  • Talking to others about my struggles with my weight and hearing their journey
  • Speaking kindly about myself (read my post Anti-Body Shaming)
  • Using the It Works Ultimate Body Applicator to help tighten and tone my mid-section  
    • wear for 45 mins. – 1 hour every 3 days (drink plenty of water)
  • Finding small ways to be active and build healthy eating habits, slowly
    • Drinking Apple Cider Vinegar Water
      • In a mason jar, add apple cider vinegar/1 tbsp. (with the mother), honey/2 tbsp., 4 lemon slices, [crush it all together] pour Spring Water to the top of jar; SHAKE WELL and serve [drink 2x daily after meals]
        • You can add Cheyenne Pepper, Strawberries, Blueberries, Mint, Cucumber and any other fruits and veggies to add to the taste.
    • Taking the stairs instead of elevators and escalators
    • Wearing layers of clothing when I clean up my house
    • Completing The 4-7-8 (Relaxing) Breathing Exercise (repeat 4x in a row/2x daily)
      • Inhale for 4 seconds
      • Hold for 7 seconds
      • Exhale for 8 seconds

These are the small ways to love your body, post-baby.

Learning to love my body for how it looks now was not easy. I still have moments where I look in the mirror and feel badly about how I look. It is embedded in us to dislike ourselves if we do not fit into the BMI that popular culture says we should be. We need to be careful of what we say to ourselves and to others, saying get your body back, makes it seem like my body is not beautiful now.


I do not need to get my body back! I may never look like I did before I had my daughter, but I can focus on what is most important, being healthy.

Love yourself because you are worth it, because you are perfectly imperfect, because you are beautiful! 

Repeat after meI am beautiful big or small. 

-Pinkspen

Ta'lor Pinkston

Hey beautiful! I am Ta'lor Pinkston, MSW|Founder of LADYHOOD journey, LLC|Self-love Social Worker|Women’s Self-love Lifestyle Blogger|Poet|Prospective Self-love Coach|Feminist|Equality Advocate LADYHOOD journey, LLC focuses on helping college girls, mothers, and every woman to incorporate self-love into their lifestyle, to be advocates for women's empowerment, and to focus on Healing Over Everything. Some of the topics discussed in my blog includes beauty standards, motherhood, body shaming, equality, and toxic relationships. In February 2018, the LADYHOOD journey Self-love Box will be launching with items to help you take care of you. I want women my site feeling inspired, uplifted, supported, and empowered on every stage of the journey. I love to spend time with my daughter, going to local bars and restaurants with family & friends, online shopping, photography, writing poetry, sipping Tea , sitting on my porch, trying new wines, and listening to music from artists like Chance the Rapper, Sabrina Claudio, Jessie Reyez, Jhene Aiko, and Coldplay,

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